My most memorable Christmas was with my in-laws in 1982. My wife is one of eight children, five girls and three boys. With most of them having their own families, the number of presents you had to buy for all the brothers, sisters, nephews, and nieces was getting out of hand. So that year it was decided that we would have a structured gift exchange, where each member would draw one name and buy a nice gift for that person. The remainder of what would have been spent on twenty or thirty presents would be contributed to a Salvation Army family.

Christmas Day we all gathered for the gift exchange. Tasteful presents of sweaters, vases, and golf stuff were opened one-at-a-time and fussed over by everyone. Then, my sister-in-law Bridget opened her present from her younger brother Nick. Nick had dropped out of college and was working on the Alaska Pipeline at the time. He was known as the party animal of the family, so I wasn’t surprised to see the framed, 2’x3’ photograph of himself in a Mexican bandito outfit, complete with bandoleers, a fake moustache and a bottle of tequila. It drew a big laugh from all the men, including me. On the other hand, the women weren’t so amused, and Bridget left room, visibly upset.

While one of the sisters went to console her, the others began chastising Nick for his thoughtless gift. Somehow the conversation morphed into a heated discussion among all the brothers and sisters about whom their mother loved more. The event ended with half the family marching out, children in tow, vowing never to speak to one another again.

Everyone has since made up, but it reminded me of how stressful the ostensibly joyful holidays can be. There are expectations to fulfill and potential disappointments to deal with. Nick probably thought he was going the extra mile by having a picture of himself taken – a truly personalized gift – and expected appreciation for it. Bridget, on the other hand, probably felt that Nick was showing her disrespect by giving her a gag gift when everyone else was getting nice stuff. Meanwhile, the rest of the family was carrying just enough angst about old hurts and injustices that all it took was this incident to ignite a family blow-up.

Even without the weird family dynamics, however, there’s a whole lot of stress that comes with the holidays as a matter of course. Presents to buy, parties to plan, people to see, traffic to fight, crowds to endure, money to worry about, expectations to look great, and pressure to make this the most perfect holiday ever. It’s no wonder that we get a bit cranky. Of course the same goes for your customers.

So when those hoards of tired and stressed out customers, with crazy family dynamics and too many people to shop for come into you store this December, and claim you ruined their holidays because you no longer carry Tuscan Meat Rub in a tin or Lemon & Key Lime fruit spread, just remember, it’s not you they’re mad at – they’re mad at my brother-in-law Nick. It’ll help you stay calm.

By Meagan Johnson and Larry Johnson
Adapted from their book:
Generations Inc. – From Boomers To Linksters, Managing the
Friction Between Generations at Work. (AMACOM Books, 2010)

o Steve is a Gen Xer who manages an office supply store and
supervises a group of 10 Gen Yers. Steve was just visited by the
parents of one of them who wanted to know why Steve had fired
their daughter.

He explained that while their daughter was talking to a customer
on the phone who had called to complain about a product, she told
the customer to “f____ off” and then hung up on him. Steve said
the parents seemed shocked that he would fire her for this and not
give her another chance.

o Kasey is a Gen Yer who has worked for a manufacturing company
for six years. She was recently promoted to Sales Administration
Manager.

Kasey says, “I never wake up dreading to go to work. As cliché as
it sounds, we are like one crazy family. This is a fun place to
work, everyone is relaxed and customers love us. I am constantly
challenged with new things to do in addition to the items already
on my to-do list. I have two bosses and I get feedback, mostly
positive from one of them at least once a day. If they say
something critical, they do it in a nice way.”

And that’s part of why I like this job. My bosses are a lot like
my parents. They’re there for me when I need them, and I can tell
they care about me. If it weren’t for them, I don’t think I would
like this job nearly as much as I do.

o Shea, a Gen Yer just graduated from graduate school with an
MBA. At an interview with an international trading company, he
told the interviewer he needed a flexible schedule. The
interviewer assured him the company allowed working from home a
couple days a month.

“No,” Shea explained. “I am a marathon runner. I do four or five
races a year. I need to be able to take time off throughout the
year to compete across the country. Also, I normally do my
training at four in the morning before I come to work, but in the
winter it’s too dark and cold then, so I’ll need to come in at
10AM rather than 8AM.

Do any of these scenarios sound familiar? Generation Y, aka the
Entitled Ones, born between 1981 and 1995, accounts for over 35%
of the workforce. In general, they were raised by aging Baby
Boomers who had postponed having children until they themselves
had completed their educations, sown their wild oats, and were
financially secure enough to do this kid thing “right.”

So unlike their own parents, who stayed out of their children’s
business unless their grades went down or the kids got in trouble,
these late-blooming Boomer parents were often heavily involved in
every aspect of their Generation Y children’s lives. The term
“latchkey kid” was replaced with phrases like “stay-at-home dad,”
“soccer mom,” and “helicopter parents.” And like helicopters, they
often hovered over their children’s every move. They arranged play
dates with friends, scheduled extracurricular activities, helped
their children with their homework (sometimes doing it for them),
and made sure the kids wanted for nothing. Whether it was
attending piano recitals, going to soccer games, running
interference with difficult teachers, or even getting involved in
their children’s’ college admissions and job interviews, these
Boomer parents often catered to their children in any way they
could.

Hence the aka: Entitled Ones. Let’s face it, if you’re raised as
the center of attention, you get used to it and will probably
expect similar treatment on the job. But that doesn’t make you a
bad person or impossible to manage, but it does require some
approaches different from managing Traditionals, Baby Boomers or
Gen Xers.

Here are some suggestions:

1. Offer Close Coaching and Guidance
Kasey is a Gen Yer we interviewed who was recently promoted to
Sales Administration Manager. She gets a yearly review, but also
receives feedback on a daily basis from one of her supervisors.
She’s responsible for all email newsletters and press
announcements. Her supervisor tells her roughly what needs to be
in the newsletter. Kasey puts it together and takes it back to the
supervisor for review.

“He tells me what he likes about it and what he would change. He
asks me why I included or failed to include some information, and
he makes suggestions to tweak it. I make the changes and have him
go over it again. He allows me to shoulder the responsibility but
I don’t feel like I am going to fall on my face because I trust
his advice.”

This approach may sound like coddling and micro managing if you’re
used to giving employees free reign to perform. We think it’s an
effective approach to use with Generation Y until they get their
sea legs and prove they can operate without it.

2. Create Opportunities to Bond
One complaint employers have about Generation Y is, “They don’t
seem to care about the job.” We would agree. Gen Yers don’t care
about the job the same way many of us didn’t care about jobs when
were that young. Given their close family upbringing, jobs that
offer Yers a sense of belonging and a family-like atmosphere will
have the most appeal to them.

3. Avoid the “good old days”
“When I was your age…” “Back in the day…” “The way we used to do
it…” ” blah, blah, blah.” It’s tempting to reminisce about the
past. Really, Generation Y can’t imagine being as old as you are,
so stop rambling on about the way it used to be. Your
responsibility is to coach them to succeed, not to relive the
touchdown you scored back in high school.

4. Be Open To Virtual Work Environments
Baby Boomers live to work. Generation Xers work to live.
Generation Yers don’t see work and life as any different – they
blend into one. To most Baby Boomers and many Gen Xers, there is a
clear distinction between working face-to-face vs. working
remotely. A Gen Yer feels comfortable being at home at 10pm on a
Sunday night, listening to iTunes, editing his blog, checking his
Facebook page, and sending a report to a client with a CC to his
boss.

The Bottom Line

Generation Y grew up with parents who spent time communicating
with them, who praised them for even the smallest victories, who
asked for their opinions when they were children, and who devoted
time to making life fun. They expect similar services from their
Baby Boomer and Gen X bosses.

You don’t have to coddle Gen Yers, but you do have to understand
what they need from you to succeed. Get in the habit of checking
in with them daily, offering praise when it is deserved and
corrective feedback when it’s needed. Be specific about jobs and
expectations. Offer flexibility in when and how they work, as long
as they perform.

And have some fun. Managers and employees of all generations can
benefit from that.

***************************************************************

Larry Johnson, Author & Certified Professional Speaker Tel:
800-836-6599 Web: http://www.larry-johnson.com E-mail:
larry@larry-johnson.com

Meagan Johnson, Author & Certified Professional Speaker Tel:
800-836-6599 Web: http://www.MeaganJohnson.com E-mail:
Meagan@MeaganJohnson.com

Meagan and I were speaking about our new book, Generations Inc. – From Boomers To Linksters, Managing the Friction Between Generations At Work

at Gannon University in Erie, PA recently when a student asked us about the daunting job market she was facing when she graduates this year. It inspired Meagan to write an article for her blog and she asked me to post it on this one.

GET A JOB! Nine things every college graduate should know to find a job in 2010

By Meagan Johnson

“Your diploma isn’t worth the paper it is printed on.”

“Your degree and a dollar will get you a bus ride across town.”

“Don’t move out of mom & dad’s house too soon, there are no jobs
available.”

“ ‘Want fries with that?’ is the only job you will be lucky enough
to find.”

Sound familiar? If you are a recent college grad, or thinking
about postponing graduation because the job market seems so bleak,
you may have heard some of these comments.

It’s nothing I didn’t hear when I graduated from college back in
1993! The country was in the middle of a recession and the media
was full of stories about college graduates swimming in student
loan debt but nowhere to work. I couldn’t believe that I had just
wasted four years going to college, only to be qualified for a job
that included managing a drive thru window.

A month after graduation, I was complaining about my blighted
future to my dad as I lay by my parent’s pool. (Yes, like many
college graduates and Gen Yers, today, I stayed at home as long as
I could.) I was whining about there being no jobs available, so he
gave me some sage advice. “You will never find a job if you do not
look for a job. (Duh)”

And he was right, so, chagrinned, I followed his advice and began
searching. Within 30 days I had landed a position as a sales
representative for Quaker Oats. The job included a company car
and paid more than I had made up to that point in my entire life.
(Gen Yers: I know many of you are more motivated by humanitarian
efforts than money, but I am a Gen Xer who came of age in the
decadent 80s, so for me, money was a motivator.)

I concede that it was a different time, and I was probably lucky.
The statistics today are grim. According to a survey conducted by
Monster.com, only 46% of organizations intend to hire any 2010
graduates at all. But, if you do decide to look, here are a few
things you can do to increase your chances of joining the ranks of
the employed.

1. Register on Jobsearch Websites: The number of websites
available to the job searcher is mind-blowing. There are the
obvious ones, like Monster.com, Careerbuilder.com, Craigslist,
LinkedIn, and Jobing.com – but there are also many sites designed
for the recent college graduate like CollegeRecruiter.com,
CollegeGrad.com, AfterCollege.com, CampusCareerCenter.com and
CoolWorks.com.

2. Use the Career Center on your college campus. It’s staffed with
people who want to help you. Be sure to sign up early. Most
college students wait until the month of graduation before even
finding out where the Career Center is located on campus. If you
approach them early in your college career, the advisors can help
you choose a major, and find part-time work in your area of
interest, long before graduation. Having the right part-time
college job can often line you up for a nice full time one after
graduation. The Career Center can also aid in writing your resume
and some will even conduct mock interviews with you to help you
hone your interviewing skills. Ellie, a Gen Y college graduate,
spent her senior year volunteering at her campus’ career center.
She was able to meet all the recruiters and gained valuable
insights just from listening to what the recruiters had to say
about candidates and interviewees. She also bagged a job after
graduation from one of the many contacts she made with recruiters.

3. Join Professional associations connected to your industry.
These organizations provide services like continuing education
units, legal representation and career development, while at the
same time, exposing you to potential employers. Additionally, this
is a good time to do it. Many associations are struggling to
attract young new members and would probably work with you to
discount some of your membership fees.

More importantly, get involved with at least one professional
association – and I mean, heavily involved. You’ll maximize the
return on your membership by volunteering to help with projects,
sitting on committees, and participating with chapter governance.
Most associations have both national and state chapters. You can
start at the chapter level and then get involved in the national.

4. Clean up your online image. The First Amendment may allow us to
put what we want on our Facebook pages, but it’s what more and
more employers are checking before hiring. Here is what a Senior
Vice President of a large wholesale distribution company said
about a recent hire. “Once I had read the candidate’s resume, I
went to LinkedIn and checked out his profile. I noticed his
interests aligned with most of our staff, so we brought him in for
an interview and eventually hired him.” Lesson: Put your best
foot forward on line, and save the picture of you mooning the
camera during spring break in Mexico for the scrapbook. Remember,
what you publish is what potential employers may, and often will
see.

5. Write a great resume. Most of us would rather visit the dentist
than write our own resume. In many cases, your resume will be what
a potential employer uses to decide if they should even invite you
in for an interview. It’s a vital marketing tool in your job
search efforts. Put aside at least three hours to draft it and
make the mental decision that writing an excellent resume is an
exciting challenge rather than a dreaded task.

Cover letter: A sharp and clever cover letter can launch your
resume to the top of the pile. A cover letter is not a repeat of
your resume but a summary of what you want the potential employer
to know right away. Cover letters can be more creative and fun
than your resume. Don’t be afraid to include the company’s logo, a
famous quote that ties into the company’s mission statement, and a
P.S. at the bottom that drives home the major contribution you can
offer to their cause. The key is to demonstrate to the employer
you know something about the company, what they are looking for
and why you are a good match.

The Body of the Resume: The mission statement of your resume
should not be a general Will Work For Food Type of statement. It
should reflect the type of job you are applying for. Your mission
statement can include the position’s title such as sales
representative, the industry in which you are applying and even
specific location such as city and state. Many organizations have
information about the kind of personalities they are looking for
on their company websites. Tweak your resume to reflect the
language of the organization. Remember resumes are not a one size
fits all; you will need to customize each resume that you send
out.

What is your secret weapon? What makes you unique or a little bit
different than all your peers applying for the same job? It could
be the volunteer work you do at the animal shelter or the fact you
can complete the Sunday Times crossword puzzle in ink. Whatever it
is, include a brief statement at the end of your resume or cover
letter.

The Quality of the Resume: Do more than spell check it. To catch
mistakes, print and read it out-loud, word for word to someone
else. Then have a friend who’s good at proof reading proof it, or
have a professional proofreader check it. There are numerous
on-line proof reading services that, for a nominal cost will
review your document to catch errors in grammar, punctuation,
spelling, and syntax. Numerous employers complain that they often
receive resumes and cover letters filled with typos, spelling
errors and other egregious mistakes that usually disqualify the
applicant immediately.

6. Dress for the interview: Find out what the norm of dress is for
the organization and then dress in a similar, well-polished
version of it. A recent college grad we know learned that the
woman with whom she was interviewing always matched her skirt
color with the color of her hose and shoes. The candidate showed
up for the interview wearing blue hose, blue shoes and a blue
skirt combined with a tasteful blue outfit. She got the job.

7. Do your homework. Never go to an interview without first
visiting the company’s website and understanding the nature of its
business. Bring multiple copies of your resume, a list of your
references and some prepared questions about the company and job.
The questions should not be about salary, vacation time or the
benefits you’ll get. They should reflect that you have done
research on the company. If possible, speak to people who are
already in the industry and ask them about their challenges, this
will help you formulate good questions.

8. Mail a thank you letter. This means write a letter, put it into
an envelope, lick a stamp and snail mail it to the person that
conducted the interview. It may seem old-fashion, but it conveys
that you were willing to do more than whip out a text message or
dash off an e-mail. Thank the person for their time and reiterate
your interest in the job.

9. UGH! It is not my dream job. Consider taking it anyway. It’s a
job, not a marriage. Plain and simple jobs are not meant to last.
You may discover you really like the job or it may not be as bad
as you think. Ask yourself:

o Will I work with people who are different from me?
This can be a great opportunity. Working with ethnically and
generationally diverse people helps you to see the world in new
ways. It’s like traveling abroad without leaving home.

o Will the experience I have at this job build my
credibility with other employers? Even if the job is not in the
field to which you aspire, employers look favorably on applicants
who can bring a depth of experience to a job. When I started
college, I did not dream that all my hard work would gain me the
prestigious title “Space Manager,” which was the official title
given to all entry level sales people at Quaker Oats. But I took
it because the offer was too good to refuse. And the truth is, I
HATED it. Working a real job was an experience nobody can explain
and no class can prepare you for. I was thrilled when after a
year, Quaker Oats eliminated my position and laid-off all the
entry-level sales reps. But I will never regret having worked
there. It opened doors for me and laid the groundwork for what I
do, and love to do today.

I recently conducted a leadership retreat for a client in Santa Fe, New Mexico, one of my favorite towns. As usual, I made a bee line to Tia Sophia , which has been my favorite purveyor of Northern New Mexican food since I first visited there 15 years ago. (Northern New Mexican is quite different from Tex-Mex, Arizona Sonoran, or California Ranchero, but that’s a subject for another article.) As usual, the green chili stew at Tia Sophia was perfect: blisteringly hot with Hatch chilies, and chock full of beef chunks and potatoes swimming in a thick, ambrosia-like broth. The beans were superb, and the posole was to die for. All reasons enough to move to Santa Fe permanently.

I had a chance to chat with the owner, Mark, who bought the place from his parents in 2005. His grandmother started the restaurant in 1936 after immigrating from Greece. That’s right, a family of Greeks who make the best Mexican food in Santa Fe – go figure.

So I asked Mark what the secret was to their long time success and their absolute consistency of food quality, taste, and service excellence. He said it was simple:

“My parents and grandparents always treated their employees right, so my wife and I have tried to continue that practice. Consequently, we have a great staff who stay with us for a life time. It makes my job of managing the place relatively easy. They really run things.”

I asked him to explain what he meant when he said that they treat the staff “right.” He replied that they pay their employees more than the other restaurants in the area pay – even the server staff’s base pay is higher. Of course, servers get most of their salary from tips, but at Tia Sophia, they don’t practice “tip sharing” where all the tips go into a pool and are then divided up. What a server gets is what he or she keeps. Consequently, each server is motivated to deliver great service and get rewarded for the effort.

Additionally, Mark said that he and his wife treat their employees with the same friendliness and courtesy that they use with their customers. I observed Mark do this as we chatted. I had arrived just at closing time, so by the time I finished eating and started talking to Mark, the last customers and many of the staff were leaving for the day. We were sitting near the front door, and Mark interrupted our conversation each time a customer or staff member left to tell them good bye and thank them. For the employees, he added, “see you tomorrow.”

This last item may sound like small potatoes (no pun intended,) but in the restaurant industry, where employee turn-over is huge, Mark, his wife, and his parents and grand parents before them, have obviously found a solution. And that translates into consistently great food and an out-of-towner like me going there every time I visit Santa Fe.

After a recent broadcast of my tele-seminar, How To Be A Great Boss, I received some questions that I suspect have application to most managers. Here are those questions and my answers. If you have other ideas for responding to these questions, I would love to hear them in the comments section of this blog or by e-mailing me at Larry@Larry-Johnson.com. If you’d like to hear this tele-seminar, I’ll be presenting it again on March 30. Go to http://larry-johnson.com/great-boss-teleseminar.shtml to enroll.

QUESTION: For the best employees, how do you provide effective feedback specifically on a project recently completed by your best employee in order to help him/her grow when he/she is already exceeding your expectations? Beyond long-term efforts in understanding and tailoring projects to his/her career goals—for day-to-day projects, do you just stop giving feedback at some point if performance continues to exceed expectations?

ANSWER: I would suggest something like: “John, as usual, you’ve done a superb job. I really like the ….” Make it short & sweet but specific to what he did so he knows you noticed and appreciate it. And I wouldn’t worry about giving too much positive feedback to your best performers. I’ve never met anyone who suffered from receiving too many sincere compliments about their work. On the other hand, I’ve met plenty of good performers who feel like they don’t get the recognition, praise, or even “thanks” they think they deserve.

QUESTION: How do you keep interest and motivation in good employees?

ANSWER: Keep the words of appreciation coming, however, more importantly, make sure you get them what they need to do a good job, and create an environment that is fun to work in because it’s challenging, stimulating, and full of good humor.

QUESTION: How do you motivate people through positive interactions? What is the evidence supporting employees’ response when managers frame negative outcomes as opportunities? Is it good to be a positive energizer all the time? If not, when should you not be a positive energizer to staff?

ANSWER: I just watched a PBS documentary titled FDR, which described the difference between Hoover and Roosevelt during the 1932 presidential election. While Hoover’s speeches were full of doom, gloom and a sense of pessimism about the economy, Roosevelt talked about hope, recovery, and the strength of America to come back. We all know who won. Almost always, a positive approach to problems trumps a pessimistic one because it instills people with the will and courage to find solutions, overcome adversity, and triumph. On the other hand, you don’t want to come across as Pollyannaish to the point that you lose credibility with your followers. So sometimes, you have to say, “Yeah, I know this stinks, but it has to be done, so let’s do it and not whine about it.” If you’re taking that approach more than 5% of the time, however, you may want to ask yourself if your negative attitude might be rubbing off on others.

QUESTION: How do you address problem employees while still rewarding good employees? Is there any fair way to implement quality assurance policies that keep the problem performers in check while not requiring your good performers to do the unneeded extra work beyond existing quality assurance measures that seem to work for the good employees?

ANSWER: If someone has a quality issue, performance issue, or behavioral issue, you should talk with him directly and in private (and always document these conversations.) If this requires that you apply stricter quality standards, so be it. Just be sure you can justify the application of those standards on clearly documented problems. For example, if you manage a researcher whose basic calculations are often flawed, ask yourself these questions: “Can I document this problem? Have I talked to the person about the problem? (If not, you should.) Has the problem continued in spite of my bringing it to his attention?” If the answers to these questions is “yes,” then taking action to more closely monitor this person’s work is justified. He may not like it, and will probably complain that you are picking on him. (This will be stressful for you but that’s why managers get paid the big bucks.) Let him know that when the problem clears up, you’ll let up. On the other hand, if the problem continues, let him know that you’ll take further action.

QUESTION: How do you address problems with chronically poor performers while still maintaining a positive relationship?

ANSWER: The idea is to correct the problem, not necessarily to maintain a positive relationship. A gentle reminder, or pointing out where something needs to be corrected is usually enough for normal and outstanding performers. After all, how many times would your boss have to point out a problem to you before you corrected it? Probably, not more than once.

For the chronic poor performer, however, I’m wondering why you’re so worried about your “positive relationship” with her. She’s either choosing to not perform or is unable to perform. In either case, the bottom line is that she either gets the problem corrected or she leaves. I know that sounds harsh, but ask yourself: “If she NEVER corrects the problem, can we tolerate it until she retires?”

So if you haven’t had a firm conversation with her about the problem, I suggest you do so without delay and be sure to document it. If the problem continues, I suggest you talk to your HR department about pursuing termination. Again, I know this sounds harsh, but you ask what to do about a “chronically poor performer,” and I have to wonder why you, your team, or your organization would tolerate someone who deserves that kind of label.

QUESTION: How do you address issues identified by other managers or the employee’s peers? How do you address an issue without mentioning the sample situation brought up by someone else or individual sharing the complaint about the employee, especially for issues that are very important to address? Do you simply wait until you, personally, have made the observation when the mistake is made?

ANSWER: If possible, yes, try to observe the behavior or issue yourself. If not possible, or the situation requires immediate action, be direct in telling the employee this behavior has come to your attention and ask why it concerns you and how he plans to correct it. When he asks, “Who said I did this?” respond, “That doesn’t matter, my concern is that it won’t happen again.

QUESTION: How do you be a “great boss” when your boss plays favorites on policies and perspectives (only listens to those managers he likes more who happen to be bad managers), even trumping some of the tried and true ‘how to be a great boss’ ideas…when you are not one of his ‘favorites’ even though you do great work and a majority of the staff admires your dedication and positive mentorship?

ANSWER: Do the best you can, creating a pocket of excellence around you. Understand that the world is full of jerks, and sometimes, you end up working for one. In any case, you only have three healthy options in life when you are in a situation you don’t like. (For those of you who’ve attended one of my speeches, read my book Absolute Honesty: Building A Corporate Culture That Values Straight Talk and Rewards Integrity, or you’ve listened in on my tele-seminars, you’ll remember it as the PAL principle.) It stands for:

PROACTIVITY: Do something about it. Ask you boss to change her behavior to make life more tolerable. For example, “Jane, in the future, if we’re going to change direction on a project, could you let me know ahead of time so I can discuss it with my team?” Or, you could go over her head, and complain to her boss (high risk here, but sometimes called for. The role of the whistleblower is dangerous but highly needed in today’s world.)

ACCEPTANCE: Ask anyone who is married or in a long-term relationship. There are certain things you just accept about your mate if you want to stay married. If your boss is a jerk, you may have to accept it and figure out ways to circumvent her jerkiness to get your job done. Of course, what you choose to do may have risk associated with it too.

LEAVE: No one is forced to work for a jerk. Unless you’re in a concentration camp, you can always leave. Even then, there are options. I suggest you read Man’s Search For Meaning by Victor Frankl. He was in a Nazi concentration camp during WWII and couldn’t leave, so he figured out ways to keep his sanity and survive.

Non PAL responses are tend to be unhealthy, eg. whining, constant complaining, depression, drinking too much alcohol or going home and kicking your dog – and what did he ever do to deserve that?

Again, if you have other answers to these questions, I’d love to hear them.

by Larry Johnson

While President Obama and the congress debate healthcare reform, not much has been said about the dedicated people who work in healthcare and the incredible differences they can make in the lives of their customers.

During a bicycling vacation through Napa Valley in 2003, CJ, my wife of 34 years was involved in an accident that changed our world. Despite wearing a helmet, she sustained a traumatic brain injury that put her into an eight weeklong coma. This was followed by a persistent vegetative state in which she was almost completely unresponsive (think Terri Schiavo). She could not move the right side of her body, she could not talk or respond to

questions, and she was completely incontinent. She was unable to swallow any solid food or liquids, and had to be fed through a stomach tube. Essentially, she was like a living corpse.

Little by little, however, she started to respond.

About two months after the accident, while visiting her at the first of three nursing homes in which she would reside, I kissed her goodnight and for the first time since the accident, she actually kissed me back. A few weeks later, against doctor’s orders (that were written for fear she might choke,) I fed her a Popsicle that I’d snuck into the nursing home and she ate it without a problem. It dawned on me that if she could eat a Popsicle, she could probably handle ice cream, so I smuggled in some Häagen-Dazs® the next night. It wasn’t long before I was sneaking in full meals from Boston Market® that I would mash up and feed her when the staff wasn’t looking.

About the same time, she also started making grunting noises that sounded like she was trying to talk and one night while an aide and I were putting a brace on her arm that she hated and always resisted, she blurted out, “Take that damn thing off!”

Today, CJ lives at home with me. The right side of her body is still paralyzed, and she still requires 24 hour care, but with the help of Connie Gunderson and Lucia Holmes, two wonderfully dedicated home-health care professionals, we live a happy, and close to normal life. CJ can converse with anyone, can feed herself with assistance, and she can engage in her life long passion of playing bridge (on a computer now with me moving the

mouse.)

In looking back at CJ’s journey from emergency trauma care on the day of the accident, through intensive-care hospitalization, through nursing home residency and finally to home-health care there were many SNAFUS and failures of the system.

There was the neurologist who told us she would have a full recovery, and the neurosurgeon who later that same day told us that her recovery was hopeless and that she would be a vegetable for the rest of her life. Both were wrong.

There was the Ear Nose & Throat specialist (hired by one of the nursing homes) who didn’t bother to bring his instruments when he came to assess whether her tracheotomy tube could be removed to make it easier for her to speak. He told the nurse to not bother

scheduling another visit because, given her “mental state, it wouldn’t make any difference.” In other words, “she’s just a vegetable, so why bother doing a real evaluation?” Another ENT later did a thorough exam and removed the tube, which in turn, contributed greatly to CJ regaining the ability to talk.

There was the nursing home aide who prepared her to go out todinner with me by putting CJ’s hair up in pigtails and placing a child’s doll under her paralyzed arm. I was appalled. CJ was a 56 year old successful business woman who had maintained 4.0 GPA in college; had been a brilliant mortgage banker who managed a team of 10 loan officers; who had achieved Life Master status as a tournament bridge player; who was an active contributor to various political causes; and was the mother of a successful adult daughter – and this aide saw her as only as a little girl.

There was the night shift nurse who refused to call the on-call doctor to get a prescription for CJ’s yeast infection because she didn’t want bother him for such a minor matter. I angrily asked her if she’d ever experienced the kind of itch that accompanies a yeast infection and would she be willing to wait until the next day to treat her own discomfort. She ignored me but, thankfully, she was fired later that week after complaints from other residents and their families.

And the list goes on. Let’s face it, the healthcare system, like any other system, is not perfect – in fact it’s highly flawed. On the other hand, we had many more positive experiences than negative, and its those we remember most.

There was Sister Rose, a nun at Santa Rosa Memorial Hospital. CJ’s mother and several of her sisters flew in from Phoenix to stand vigil with our daughter Meagan and me in the intensive care unit until she came out of the coma. Sister Rose went out of her way to find us a small home to rent so we wouldn’t have to pay hotel bills for a month.

There was Richard, the night shift nurse in intensive care who, after passing his meds and doing his charting would come into the room and sit with us for hours, reassuring us that CJ’s brain was healing and that she would get better. He never gave us false hope, but he sure made us feel better.

There was Dr. Christina Kwasnica, who has treated CJ from the beginning and was the only doctor to express realistic optimism that CJ would improve.

There was Pam, the evening nurse at one of the nursing homes who noticed that two of CJ’s medicines were stimulants and wondered why she was receiving them at 8:00PM. It turns out that a doctor contracted by the nursing home had prescribed them to be given twice per day and in a nursing home that translates into 8:00AM and 8:00PM. No wonder CJ wasn’t sleeping well at the time.

And there was the kindness of Mavis, a nursing home aide who took a special interest in CJ. She would talk to her like she would to a sister or a best friend, kidding CJ about small matters, and telling CJ all the latest gossip in the nursing home: who was getting in trouble and why; who was fighting with whom; and whowas sleeping with whom – stuff I’m sure the nursing home administrator would not have wanted Mavis to discuss with her – but given that most people treated CJ like a child or like she just wasn’t there, Mavis’ sisterly banter was a blessing.

Most of all, there are Connie and Lucia, the two home health professionals who, for the past five years have helped me take care of CJ at home. They work extra hours without hesitation, they bring presents to CJ, and they call in on their days off to inquire about CJ’s health or to tell me about something CJ had said: “Did she have a bowel movement? Is her stomach still upset? Did I tell you that CJ asked about the healthcare debate she was watching on TV?”

The point is that the flaws of the healthcare system are numerous but can be outweighed by those in the system who perform with professionalism and care. Our hats go off to the Sister Roses, the Richards, the Dr. Kwasnicas, the Pams, the Mavises, the Connies and the Lucias. My hope is that they go home every night with the satisfaction of knowing they’ve made a difference in someone’s life, for that can be very rewarding.

Question: Regardless of your field of business, do you make a positive difference in the lives of your customers? Your friends? Your family? The strangers you meet as you pass through this life?

To view a video demo of the presentation CJ and I do about our experiences, go to: http://thereisnothey.net/index.php

To purchase the full presentation on DVD, go to:

http://larry-johnson.com/products.shtml

Larry Johnson, Author & Certified Professional Speaker Tel:

800-836-6599 Web: http://www.larry-johnson.com E-mail:

larry@larry-johnson.com

Meagan Johnson, Author & Certified Professional Speaker Tel:

800-836-6599 Web: http://www.MeaganJohnson.com E-mail:

Meagan@MeaganJohnson.com Web: http://www.larry-johnson.com E-mail:

larry@larry-johnson.com

Early in my career, I was working for a government institution, and was assigned a new manager. We didn’t know each other except by reputation. We were as different as dirt and water. I had long hair and a beard; he was clean-shaven and sported a crew-cut. My politics were liberal; he was a Nixon Republican. I attended protests against the Vietnam War; he had completed two tours of duty there and was a decorated Marine Corp officer. I liked to wear Navajo shaman shirts and moccasins; he was never caught without a sport coat and tie.

You get the picture.

Shortly after he started, he questioned why I’d taken so long to go to another building to attend a meeting.

I was furious. Who was this “soldier boy” to question how I spent my time getting my job done. I was a professional with a masters degree, for gosh sakes. Of course, the logical thing for me to do was to ask Mike what he had wanted and clarify why I needed to take two hours. It also would have been a good time to discuss our mutual expectations about how I manage my time.

But did I do that? Nooooooo. I was much too immature at the time. So I sulked and stewed about it for weeks without saying a word to him. I was civil, but not friendly. I avoided him when I could and avoided eye contact when I couldn’t. I did the minimum required and became disagreeable to the point of belligerence whenever we discussed an issue. I also bad-mouthed him to others whenever I got the chance. I was well on the way to becoming an “Employee From Hell.”

A few weeks later, Mike walked into my office, closed the door. “I get the feeling you’re ticked off at me. Is that true?” he asked. I did my best to look puzzled and denied there was anything wrong. He looked me in the eye and said, “B—s—. I can tell when something’s wrong. I want you to level with me.” When I told him, he was dumbfounded. It turns out that he hadn’t meant to accuse me of slacking, which is how I had interpreted his asking about the time I’d taken. He then apologized and asked that we start off on a new foot.

From that day forward, Mike and I got along just fine. Looking back, I realize that I acted so childishly was because I was feeling a little paranoid because Mike was my total opposite. I had created such a negative image of him in my head before I ever met him that I was ready to jump on anything he did.

It makes me realize that as managers, our employees watch us closely. We have power over them. We can affect their careers and their lives. Consequently, they watch us closely and our actions can take on meaning for them that may get distorted or blown out of proportion. For example, in one of my management seminars, I made mention of the CEO of the company that was sponsoring the event. A woman in the front row, who worked for that company let out a disgusted gasp and rolled her eyes. I asked her later in private about her response and why she seemed to dislike the man. She replied that she thought he was stuck up. (Yeah, sounds like high school, right?) When I asked her why, she replied that the two times she had ever had any contact with him was in the hallway where she had said “good morning,” and he had not replied to her.

I happened to know the fellow and I found him to be a charming, kind and considerate person who would never intentionally blow someone off like that. He did happen to be an absent minded professor type, and my guess is that he hadn’t even heard her say “good morning” because he was preoccupied with another matter.

The scary part here is that as managers, if we don’t take action to intervene, like Mike did with me, the perceived insult can fester into a sore worker who can eventually become an Employee From Hell. So I suggest practicing some vigilance watching how people respond to you. If you sense trouble in the waters, don’t be afraid to have one of those difficult conversations where you bring the issue out in the open. The worse thing that can happen is that the person denies any problem, but at least he knows you’re interested.

1. Determine the purpose. People are quick to judge something
as stupid if it wastes their time. Holding a Friday afternoon
meeting every Friday because it’s Friday is stupid. Having a
clear purpose for the meeting that contributes to everyone’s
success is smart.

2. Consider alternatives to meetings. Can the purpose be
accomplished equally well through a less time-consuming method
such as email, Twitter, Facebook or through audio or video
conferencing? If the purpose is simply to keep everyone
informed, maybe so. If it’s to discuss a complicated matter,
generate enthusiasm for a new plan, or brainstorm solutions to a
problem, maybe not. The bottom line is not to hold meetings just
for the sake of holding meetings. It will drive your productive
people crazy.

3. Create an agenda. Be sure to identify who, what, and when.
In other words, each item on the agenda should describe who’s
responsible for presenting the issue, what they expect to
accomplish (decision, solution, information dissemination, etc.),
and how long they expect to take (e.g., 2:00pm-2:15pm).

4. Start on time. How often have you arrived at a meeting at
the scheduled time only to have it start fifteen minutes late?
The problem with starting meetings late is that they then tend to
run late. It also insults the people who made an effort to get
there on time and rewards the people who got there late. Finally,
it teaches those who are concerned about their time to arrive
late on purpose. If you want your meetings to start on time,
start them on time, even if people are missing. As people learn
that a 2:00PM meeting really starts at 2:00PM, they will begin to
get there on time. Either way, proceed whether they are there or
not.

5. End on time. How often have you attended a meeting that was
scheduled to end at 3:00PM only to have it drag on to 4:00PM or
5:00PM or later? There is only one reason meetings don’t end on
time: they don’t end on time. If you want your meetings to end on
time, end them on time. If you stick to the ending time, a magic
thing will begin to occur. As the ending time approaches, people
start talking faster. They come to the point quicker and they
digress less. It follows the famous Parkinson’s Law, which says,
“Work expands to fill the time available for its completion.”

6. Stick to the agenda. This will help keep the meeting from
getting off track.

7. Assign responsibilities. People like to know what they are
responsible for. If a meeting ends and there is not clarity about
who’s going to do what by when, people will often assume it’s
someone else’s responsibility. When they’re asked later why they
didn’t produce, they will blame you for not clarifying that they
were supposed to do it.

8. Take notes and publish minutes with assigned
responsibilities clearly defined. That way, when the people get
the email with the minutes, they know what they’re supposed to
handle and they can act accordingly. Start every meeting by
reviewing who was supposed to do what and ask for their status
reports.

Jack Welch, the legendary CEO of General Electric, has often said of his time at GE, “My main job was developing talent. I was a gardener providing water and other nourishment to our top 750 people. Of course, I had to pull out some weeds, too.” He believed that one of the primary roles of a manager is to teach others. Consequently, Welch presented more than 250 lecture sessions to over 15,000 managers at GE’s training center.

So what makes a good teacher? Meagan and I have conducted seminars all over the world and we’ve discovered some basics of teaching that seem to raise the odds a seminar will be successful. We believe you can apply these basics to teaching subordinates and colleagues as well.
 
1. Capture the listener immediately. Back in the 80′s, I was on the faculty of a  seminar company that marketed it’s programs in cities across the US via direct mail. In addition to teaching these seminars weekly, the faculty met annually to discuss how the business was going and to exchange ideas for improving the programs. And every year, to remind us of how much it cost to entice customers to sign up for the seminars, we were told by the company’s management that the typical response rate to a direct mailing campaign was about .3 percent. In other words, the company had to mail 1000 brochures for every three customers who signed up for the session. This seemed interesting, but not nearly as impressive, however, as the year they rolled in a 4×4 foot pallet, stacked five feet high with brochures and told us that this was how many they had to mail in any particular city in order to fill a seminar room with 90 registrants. Wow! That really captured our attention.

The experience taught me to lead off any lecture or presentation with a powerful story or vivid demonstration that grabs the listeners’ attention and creates a picture in their heads of what I want them to remember. Doing so resulted in an immediate jump in the evaluation scores of my programs.

2. Engage the learner. When I’m teaching a management class, I’ll often ask the audience to write a list of words describing the best and worst managers they’ve ever had. Then we discuss these characteristics in a back-and-forth. This allows the audience to participate in the learning process so they contribute while they learn. Once the audience is engaged and has a framework in their minds of what good managers and bad ones look like, they are ready to hear about how they can put to work whatever management theory you are trying to convey.

3. Show rather than tell by using stories. Stories are powerful ways to show concepts, which is why books and movies are so popular. You can tell someone that a one percent reduction in the interest rate on a home loan will result in a significant savings, or you can show them by working out the numbers on their own mortgage so they can see for themselves what the savings will be. You can tell someone how to drive a car, but it’s better to show them so they can see how you do it. You can tell someone that if you never say “no” to a child, you will likely create a monster, or you can show them by telling a story about someone you know who created their own little monster.

4. Have them try while you watch. In many cases, showing is not enough. You can tell someone how to swing a golf club until the cows come home, but until he experiences it for himself, he will never be able to do it. No amount of discussion prepares him for actually doing the deed. Until you watch the student perform, you don’t know if he truly understands how to correct his mistakes.

I’m offering a new tele-seminar this month for supervisors,
managers, and those who plan to take on those roles in the future.
It’s titled “How To Be A Great Boss.”

Here are the details:

PREMISE:

“Good employees don’t quit their companies – they divorce their
supervisors.” Larry Johnson

DESCRIPTION:

This lively presentation will give you tools to use with your
team that will raise their productivity, increase their
customers’ satisfaction ratings, reduce staff turn-over, and
enhance employee morale. The program is based on solid research
that shows you what you can actually DO to make a significant,
positive impact on the performance of your team.

LEARNING OBJECTIVES

You will learn how to:

o Nurture the top six proven workplace factors that will
maximize employee performance

o Apply three Critical Do’s and Don’ts that can make or break
your team’s spirit

o Build a team culture where people will want to excel

o Challenge your employees to exceed expectations

o Apply the principle of mutual reciprocity to employee
relations

o Utilize the one secret principle that will create employee
loyalty toward you and your organization

INCLUDED: You’ll get a comprehensive handout in pdf form,
e-mailed to you prior to the program for which you will have
permission to print copies for all who listen in with you on the
day of the program.

BONUS: You’ll get your specific questions addressed in a live Q&A
immediately following the presentation. Larry will stay on the
line as long as it takes to answer everybody’s questions.

ADDITIONAL BONUS: Your fee includes everyone in your office who
can listen in on your speaker phone.

What People Have Said About Larry Johnson and his How To Be A
Great Boss Seminar:

“Very practical and concise – lots of fun.” Tom Donovan, VP of
Distribution, Koch International, Port Washington, NY.

“Excellent speaker, great content. Simple conversation, simple
advice, simple rules.” Theresa MacPhee, Customer Service
Manager, MTT, Halifax, NS.

“Larry was passionate and involved in the presentation. BEST
SESSION SO FAR AT THIS CONFERENCE” Ruth Ginsberg, President,
California Closets.

“Great presenter! Excellent use of humor & story to make
presentation come alive. Thank you.” Kim Kelley, Customer
Service Manager, Avista Advantage, Spokane, WA.

“It was great to hear from other about ways they reward and
motivate others. It was also good to learn about the
INTANGIBLES!” Deborah Pollock, System Analyst, Texas Comptroller,
Austin, TX.

“Larry is very inspirational. Great humor!” Ruth Clark,
Director of the Call Center, Bodek & Rhodes, Philidelphia, PA.

“I appreciate the real-world examples and the audience
interaction – an excellent speaker – motivational and engaging.
Thank you for allowing us to share ideas.” Mary L. Clement, Sr.
Program Manager, Nortel Networks, RTP, NC.

“Great energy for an end-of-day session. I liked the interaction
with the group. Took back motivational ideas and DO’S AND
DON’TS.” Loralee Stickel, Mgr. of Business Development,
Interactive Data.

Date: November 18, 2009,

Time: 1:00PM to 2:00PM Eastern Standard Time

Cost: $99

Sign up link:

http://www.larry-johnson.com/great-boss-teleseminar.shtml

Please come join me for what should be a very worthwhile learning
experience.